Before I get to the gossip, a note to Bill Simmons if you've started reading these hallowed pages - you poor, poor bastard. Spurs? You have no idea what you're getting yourself into. Only heartbreak and misery lies down that road (or Lane in this case).
These are starting to get a bit repetitive but I've got some time on my hands, so here goes the EPL Gossip for
Wednesday, July 19...
MANNY FERNANDES THE LATEST TO POMPEY? Apparently Pompey really do want to become the poor man's Chelsea by signing even lesser-known Portugese players for insane transfer fees. If he is, as The Special One says, the next Makelele then his presence, if it materializes, is of more benefit to the rest of the Pompey defense and their keeper than it is of direct fantasy benefit to those who include him in their line-up. Regardless, its fun to see what 'arry will do with lots and lots of someone else's money to squander. You do have to wonder if his Russian keeper will have him offed once he realizes how badly his money was spent.
CHELSKI TO BUY A LEFTIE - Blah, blah, blah - Ashley Cole to Chelsea...get it over with or don't but stop talking about it unless there's some actual news.
RAFA NOT FINISHED YET - Feyenoord want £14 million for Kuyt? What sort of hash are they smoking over there? Did they watch the World Cup? If I were them, I'd take the money and run (and buy Mido who we all know can light up the Eredivisie). I have to admit I still don't understand this one for 'Pool.
AND THE REST
AC Milan have rejected a £50m bid from Chelski for Kaka - someone apparently has WAY too much time on their hands to think that there's still room in Chelsea's midfield with Ballack, Lamps, Essien, Makelele, Robben, Cole, Duff, and SWP fighting for time
If Ashley Cole leaves Arsenal, the Gunners will look to sign Lilian Thuram - Finally, a rumor that makes sense - Thuram will be too old to help Juve once they get back to Serie A so they might as well sell and based on his World Cup performance he still has what it takes to make an impact in a rotation with Toure and Senderos (when he returns)
Sam Allardyce wants to sign Atletico Madrid's right back Juan Velasco and Argentina captain Juan Pablo Sorin - Nice, another goofy-haired holding midfielder for Big Sam - doesn't he realize he already has Campo?
Mark Hughes wants to sign Benni McCarthy, and is still in talks with Mido - Mido at Rovers would be spectacular too bad Bellamy won't be around to continue to spice things up. Seriously, though this would be a great addition for Hughes and would be a much needed option for fantasy managers looking for an occasional starting striker.
Franck Queudrue is set to join Fulahm for £2m - Fulham need help just about everywhere so why not? Althought Queudrue probably loses some fantasy value by heading to a team that will produce fewer clean sheets and provide him more reasons to accumulate cards.
Steed Malbranque has rejected a move in the opposite direction - Steed has been linked with just about everyone outside the Top 6, he really should make a decision soon and get on with it. His value will probably stay pretty much constant presuming he is guaranteed a starting role wherever he lands (so long as that isn't NUFC where he will undoubtedly blow out a knee stepping off the podium used to sign his contract)...